6-4-10
Wow what a week as far as loving myself it’s truly been a Bad Romance! But it ends well so don’t be afraid to read the story. LOL
It started out over the weekend, I was still hurting a great deal over the discord with my friend I had been close to....so bad that I would just sob till my body shook which in itself would amaze me as I haven’t sobbed that hard since I was a kid. I'd just remember a favorite song, particularly this part where the singer sort of moans out a long wail but to me it was this deep pain and well I just haven’t felt that level of sadness for a very long time! But then again I don’t think my heart has been this open since I as a kid. It's funny I recall saying a few months ago to this person "I feel like my heart is thawing and the ice is falling off" It stung a little but I knew it was good.
Saturday I went to a BBQ with friends and just fell asleep there due to the emotional exhaustion of all this, Sunday I stopped off after church to buy dessert for another BBQ and ran into a friend from Meetup---ended up sitting there talking to her for awhile and giving her a SpiritStone--I gotta say running into people with troubles and talking to them and sharing stones is a good way to forget your own problems! So needless to say another BBQ was missed......
Well Monday rolled around and I was supposed to go shopping with a gal pal...however somehow ended up on the phone for 3hrs with the friend I was having problems with, I must say I didn't really feel the warm and fuzzies at that point but at least there was communication going on.
So back to work Tue, back to facing the health issues of my mother and dealing with my teenage son, and talking with my realtor about house selling strategies and getting stone kits ready for sale at the benefit this weekend, worrying about where the next mortgage payment is going to come from and going to Zumba and trying to find out why my weight loss has been at a plateau for over a month, and well my head's been spinning all week trying to keep up! Boy was I happy when my Spiritual in NJ friend offered to come over and give me a Reiki treatment Thursday! I must tell you it was amazing! She and I just connect on a level that I haven’t been able to connect on before! I am talking to her about me and my experiences and my challenges and my joys and my energy ebbs and flows and she gets it! She really really gets it! I learned a lot from her about the dynamic going on with me and my friend.....the most insightful was how she showed me I was defending my female energy from him (and he probably his self from me as well).....think of Greek mythology for a moment...who was the toughest monster for them to defeat? Medusa! And how did they finally do it? By holding up a mirror to her so she had to look at her own ugliness! Well sometimes we do this to those we are close to, (remember my saying how no one can push your buttons better than the ones we are closest to?) And so it was. I felt hurt so I fought back the strongest way I could, by shoving the mirror in his face and saying see this is what YOU need to fix. And you know that’s really not my place to do with anyone, nor is it anyone’s ever! God is much more kind to us, showing to us slowly and gently the truth of who we are and what we need to fix at the right stages. And even though I thought to myself that I was trying to help this person, as they had helped me, it still just wasn’t the thing to do.
But anyway, today Friday ended pretty well and after work I was headed to meet a friend for a drink and meet a group for a movie. I was leaving work and driving on a very busy road near the Somerville circle and a bear came running out and almost into my car!(he looked exactly like the pic below) You’d have to know this area to know how odd that was to see! I texted some friends and got various replies--did u call the police, are you still shaking, did you give the bear Reiki? The most intriguing though was do you know what the totem meaning is for bear?
Well I had my drink and dinner, saw the movie, listened to my gal pal’s story about the stone I had given her last week, gave a stone I charged with extra healing power to another friend who is having back disk problems and a quickie Reiki session in the car and headed home to look up the bear totem………….it’s pretty neat, read below. I know this is a new animal to my totem, earned through the digging deep of the pain and hollowing out of the very core of my being. But they say the deeper the pain goes the greater the space it leaves to be filled back up with all the good things. I am going to believe in that and welcome my Bear Spirit and use his power to help everyone who comes my way.
Have a great weekend!
With Love, Cassie
Bear: Aug 22 – Sep 21
Pragmatic, and methodical the Bear is the one to call when a steady hand is needed. The Bear's practicality and level-headedness makes him/her an excellent business partner. Usually the voice of reason in most scenarios, the Bear is a good balance for Owls. The Bear was one of the first animals to be revered by humans. . Many Native American cultures believe that the Great Spirit lives through the bear and that it is a creature of the dreams of shamans and mystics. The Bear is also gifted with an enormous heart, and a penchant for generosity. However, one might not know it as the Bear tends to be very modest, and a bit shy.
The bear is highly protective of its charges and the most dangerous animal in the woods is a bear mother protecting her cubs. Hibernating during the winter months the bear knows instinctively the times to be quiet and the times to be active. In a loving environment this Native American animal symbol showers love and generosity in return. Further, the Bear has a capacity for patience and temperance, which makes him/her excellent teachers and mentors. Left to his/her own devices the bear can be skeptical, sloth, small-minded and reclusive
Bear medicine teaches us introspection that aides in the understanding of life's lessons and in the discovery that we have the answers to all questions within us. Do not be too quick to anger nor too sure of your own power for that may lead to a lack of caution. Understand that you sometimes need to be alone in order to reflect on life's journey. Native American Totem Animal for "Virgo"
Wow what a week as far as loving myself it’s truly been a Bad Romance! But it ends well so don’t be afraid to read the story. LOL
It started out over the weekend, I was still hurting a great deal over the discord with my friend I had been close to....so bad that I would just sob till my body shook which in itself would amaze me as I haven’t sobbed that hard since I was a kid. I'd just remember a favorite song, particularly this part where the singer sort of moans out a long wail but to me it was this deep pain and well I just haven’t felt that level of sadness for a very long time! But then again I don’t think my heart has been this open since I as a kid. It's funny I recall saying a few months ago to this person "I feel like my heart is thawing and the ice is falling off" It stung a little but I knew it was good.
Saturday I went to a BBQ with friends and just fell asleep there due to the emotional exhaustion of all this, Sunday I stopped off after church to buy dessert for another BBQ and ran into a friend from Meetup---ended up sitting there talking to her for awhile and giving her a SpiritStone--I gotta say running into people with troubles and talking to them and sharing stones is a good way to forget your own problems! So needless to say another BBQ was missed......
Well Monday rolled around and I was supposed to go shopping with a gal pal...however somehow ended up on the phone for 3hrs with the friend I was having problems with, I must say I didn't really feel the warm and fuzzies at that point but at least there was communication going on.
So back to work Tue, back to facing the health issues of my mother and dealing with my teenage son, and talking with my realtor about house selling strategies and getting stone kits ready for sale at the benefit this weekend, worrying about where the next mortgage payment is going to come from and going to Zumba and trying to find out why my weight loss has been at a plateau for over a month, and well my head's been spinning all week trying to keep up! Boy was I happy when my Spiritual in NJ friend offered to come over and give me a Reiki treatment Thursday! I must tell you it was amazing! She and I just connect on a level that I haven’t been able to connect on before! I am talking to her about me and my experiences and my challenges and my joys and my energy ebbs and flows and she gets it! She really really gets it! I learned a lot from her about the dynamic going on with me and my friend.....the most insightful was how she showed me I was defending my female energy from him (and he probably his self from me as well).....think of Greek mythology for a moment...who was the toughest monster for them to defeat? Medusa! And how did they finally do it? By holding up a mirror to her so she had to look at her own ugliness! Well sometimes we do this to those we are close to, (remember my saying how no one can push your buttons better than the ones we are closest to?) And so it was. I felt hurt so I fought back the strongest way I could, by shoving the mirror in his face and saying see this is what YOU need to fix. And you know that’s really not my place to do with anyone, nor is it anyone’s ever! God is much more kind to us, showing to us slowly and gently the truth of who we are and what we need to fix at the right stages. And even though I thought to myself that I was trying to help this person, as they had helped me, it still just wasn’t the thing to do.
But anyway, today Friday ended pretty well and after work I was headed to meet a friend for a drink and meet a group for a movie. I was leaving work and driving on a very busy road near the Somerville circle and a bear came running out and almost into my car!(he looked exactly like the pic below) You’d have to know this area to know how odd that was to see! I texted some friends and got various replies--did u call the police, are you still shaking, did you give the bear Reiki? The most intriguing though was do you know what the totem meaning is for bear?
Well I had my drink and dinner, saw the movie, listened to my gal pal’s story about the stone I had given her last week, gave a stone I charged with extra healing power to another friend who is having back disk problems and a quickie Reiki session in the car and headed home to look up the bear totem………….it’s pretty neat, read below. I know this is a new animal to my totem, earned through the digging deep of the pain and hollowing out of the very core of my being. But they say the deeper the pain goes the greater the space it leaves to be filled back up with all the good things. I am going to believe in that and welcome my Bear Spirit and use his power to help everyone who comes my way.
Have a great weekend!
With Love, Cassie
Bear: Aug 22 – Sep 21
Pragmatic, and methodical the Bear is the one to call when a steady hand is needed. The Bear's practicality and level-headedness makes him/her an excellent business partner. Usually the voice of reason in most scenarios, the Bear is a good balance for Owls. The Bear was one of the first animals to be revered by humans. . Many Native American cultures believe that the Great Spirit lives through the bear and that it is a creature of the dreams of shamans and mystics. The Bear is also gifted with an enormous heart, and a penchant for generosity. However, one might not know it as the Bear tends to be very modest, and a bit shy.
The bear is highly protective of its charges and the most dangerous animal in the woods is a bear mother protecting her cubs. Hibernating during the winter months the bear knows instinctively the times to be quiet and the times to be active. In a loving environment this Native American animal symbol showers love and generosity in return. Further, the Bear has a capacity for patience and temperance, which makes him/her excellent teachers and mentors. Left to his/her own devices the bear can be skeptical, sloth, small-minded and reclusive
Bear medicine teaches us introspection that aides in the understanding of life's lessons and in the discovery that we have the answers to all questions within us. Do not be too quick to anger nor too sure of your own power for that may lead to a lack of caution. Understand that you sometimes need to be alone in order to reflect on life's journey. Native American Totem Animal for "Virgo"
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