7-4-10 Love Your Body

 

7-4-10    Love Your Body

Happy 4th of July! Here I am sitting home instead of out at a BBQ. My back and hips have been hurting me on and off for a week and yesterday I walked very very far in soft sand and well that did me in! But quite honestly I am enjoying my day of rest and peace and not at all missing the BBQ's in the hot 97 degree weather.
It's also the first year in probably 10 that I haven't had a really big party here. I have ran a singles/social group for years now and met many wonderful friends and had many amazing parties. Last year I think we hit 175 people! It's been amazing to be host to all of that but this year I was really looking forward to attending a party someone else hosted! Ahhh but there's always next year....

Anyway, I did a really amazing thing yesterday! If you recall I told you I had a really bold inspiration for my learn to love my body as it is resolution. Well it got postponed a week but I am happy to say that yesterday I did it! I went to the clothing optional beach and got sky clad! (well top half anyway but still...) I have been hanging out with an old boyfriend , now friend, lately and when we dated he always wanted me to go there with him. I toyed with the idea but time restrictions and circumstances prevented it from ever happening.
I gotta say though that he was an excellent choice of a person to go there with, he's very gentle yet persistent in a nice sort of way and put up with me being timid at first. Now walking from the boardwalk to the spot he wanted to go to was fine, having been a nurse I have no problem seeing naked people, it was pretty neat actually to see how free they all looked playing volley ball, chasing Frisbees, frolicking in the waves, eating, drinking, all the things they do on the "regular" beaches. And some people had clothes on so I knew it would be OK if I chickened out. LOL

So I thought getting there and laying on the blanket and disrobing was going to be plenty but he had other plans! He expected me to walk down and go in the water with him like that! OMG I'd rather die! But he stood up and held his hand out to me saying ahhhh come on, look you look better than lots of these people, no one cares what you look like here, come on please go with me don't make me go alone.... till I took his hand and we strolled down to the water. Let me tell you I wish I had done this decades ago! The feel of the breeze and the sun and the water on your body well that's nature at its best! (interestingly enough nature was the card of the day yesterday). We walked up and down the edge of the water hand in hand and stopped and talked to people too, so free and friendly they are! I like that, I am that way sometimes but I want to be that way all the time!

Later laying soaking up the sun I looked up at him, smiling down on me and so very grateful and happy to be with me, and I saw the reflection of me in his mirrored sunglasses (and he was right I didn't look any worse than a lot of the people there) and I remembered how awesome it feels to be looked upon with love by someone who likes you just the way you are. We really should look in the mirror in our homes and see eyes that are looking back at us with love and total acceptance.........Love yourself! Your WHOLE self the inside and the outside too because you really are beautiful and anyone who doesn't see you as beautiful just really isn't looking!

Today this 4th of July I don't regret the extra pounds I put on or put myself down for it or regret the men who passed me by (as I told my friend in my vulnerable years it kept the shallow people away) now that I am strong I plan to melt these pounds off so that I can do all the hiking, mountain biking, exploring and dancing in the moonlight I plan to do in my coming years! The only regret I have is that my tenant/web master for some reason has gone all Tom Sawyer on me. He was mumbling all day about shoulda had a party like we always did (even though he grumbled then about all the work they were). But if he weren't down there now camping and fishing on my island I'd go out and do another thing I always wanted to do....skinny dip in my river in the moonlight! But hey it's only July and I got the rest of my life to love my body no matter what size it is at the moment I hope you all do too!
After all, it's the container that holds your soul and those who really see you will grin from ear to ear to see it heading their way........look into the mirrors of the eyes that love you and see what they see.........



With Love and in the Light, Cassie
B.O.B. -- Nothing on You

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