Yesterday was interesting, I didn't get much done of what I had planned to do but I got a lot of other things done. It started off with my new tenant, who's on probation for drug/alcohol abuse and had his case workers come here and inspect the place. There is a very strict no alcohol, no weapons rule and the last place he stayed they came to inspect the couple had a mini champagne bottle a wedding favor souvenir and some other display bottles of alcohol, the decorative type and she busted him for that and they put him in jail for three days! Paranoid is not the word for him let me tell ya! But if you recall a few weeks ago, due to my sons abuse of my rules I looked heavenward and told God, asking him for help of course, there will be no more drugs on my property! Well this guy wanting the room seemed an answer to prayer, I told him if he found anything ever he had my permission to toss it in the river!
So anyway they came and they inspected and I shook her hand and they thanked me for giving him a chance, no problem I said (if they only knew the people I gave chances to over the years) haha! They checked the whole place, even my room and my sons room, the yard too and were satisfied. After they left he came into my room where I was sorting clothes and I said not to be politically in-correct but sorry these two minorities represented here, they got a tiny bit of power and now they abuse it. They had came more than 45 minutes late, I wanted to say something about wasting my time (I had a client coming at 11) but he said no no don't tick them off! So he come and he reaches under my bed and he got out my medieval sword I got at a Ren Fair, put it back then he got out my mouth wash and put it back. OMG are you kidding me? You been clean how long? 2 years he said. I told him see I hate the abuse of power, they treated my son the same way. Sure in the beginning you come down hard, but as they do well you should let people earn back trust. If I had kept my sons under my thumb like that how would they have ever grown? I swear there is so much wrong with the penal society today, there is no rehabilitation only humiliation and degradation. I wish someday to be able to make a difference in this area....
Anyway after that my Reiki client came, she is one who used to come to me fairly regularly and hadn't for some time, we had much to talk about. She said she had two problems, one she just had a hysterectomy and also man problems (what woman doesn't have man problems I thought). I am glad to see that pain is ended I told her, yes the doctors were astounded and asked how I did it, she said she just learned to live with it. Yes I know how that works I told her, you get numb and take far more than you would if you were healthy...same thing for emotional pain..... Next she told me about the man she was interested in and all that was going on and all that was keeping them from a happy ever after. I was astounded to hear how so much of what was going on was similar to what I had been through with my mystery man (remember I am not calling him my ex-BF anymore). So not only did I get to tell her what I had learned it reminded me of the parts that I had forgotten! You really can teach when you are still a student and it will re-enforce your lessons. After the session we did a quick Angel card reading, I had her ask three different questions and I had her pull three cards for each question. I didn't have time to go into great detail, we had spent 2 hrs together instead of the customary 1 but I gave her a brief overview and directed her to my facebook page where she could find the cards photos and meanings. Go there and meditate and I am available via e-mail I said.
Next I spoke to Victor, he and I were thinking of getting together to discuss our business plan for SpiritStones so I was telling him my plans for the day. I started off with I am going to go ride my bike....that will take 5 minutes OK then what. I was truly offended by that and told him so. He laughs and says I know I am such a bastard but I love it, its fun, and you know I am a good hearted person. Yeah sure I know but the rest of the world doesn't.....I gotta say though I ended up not riding my bike at all yesterday, the sting of his words stuck with me all day.....then again I should have been strong enough to rise above them.....
Off to the dollar store next, my little voice told me to get my mystery man a new pair of reading glasses (I am too stubborn to go to an optometrist and so is he). A voice had told me now a third time he needs a higher strength,the ones I saw on his head in the pic he sent me did look like the ones I got him 3 yrs ago, so I got them and headed off to the grocery store. While there he texted me, finally an answer to the one I had sent the night before! I didn't try it yet he said, OK I sent back, was just thinking about you, got you a present....Oh he replied, my heart sank I hate when he just say Oh I feel kinda rejected. It was cheap, and I made $35 today don't worry, OK thanks he replies. Ugh I still felt rejected, little girl that I am.....I am sorry I said I think it was your grandma whispering to me again she wants to be sure you have all you need. He didn't reply back but I knew he knew what I meant, she had come to Mary and I more than a few times when he and I first started dating and told me things, I think the night I broke up with him it was her who flashed the lights. But anyway.....
I never made it to my BBQ I was invited to but spent the evening getting an old makeup vanity from craigslist with my son, only $20 and it is cedar lined drawers! We went back for the dresser too for him. I had wanted to buy myself a new vanity for my birthday but can't afford it, this once my son sanded and re-varnished would be lovely, last forever and by the time I don't need it anymore a priceless antique if I kept it long enough......I think we should do more fixing things up and keeping them instead of always throwing out and getting new........things and relationships....if they are durable and just have a few blemishes those can always be sanded down and re-painted....
By 10pm I was tired, and very glad I didn't go out, the day had worn me out. I was feeling a tad lonely though but paying attention to the signs and not bothering my mystery man anymore. I am OK alone for a bit I told myself.......I had told my client the same thing that day about don't panic wondering why you aren't hearing from him, sit still he will come back...just like a butterfly......... My phone lit up with a text message.. it was from my mystery man! Hi it said, Hi I sent back how was your day? Easy going and fun only 13 hours he replied. I knew he wasn't being sarcastic, another thing I love about him he says what he means.....I'm so glad I sent back, next step get the auto job to M-F so you can play on weekends. Someday I will and stay in my vacation home he replied. I wondered what he meant buy that, secretly hoping he meant to come stay with me on weekends...so I sent back where? with who....I'm gonna by a vacation home in VT in a couple years. My heart sank a little, he didn't want to be with me, he didnt say he wanted me there with him either....are you going to go every weekend I tentatively sent back? I made an emergency call to Mary saying see he doesn't want me, well you two talked about a home at the shore and a home in VT she reminded me. Yeah but we never said out loud that it would be TOGETHER I said......he never says anything about the future for us I said and he told me a man will tell you what he means, he tells me so little! All my friends tell me I am clinging to the unseen. Yes yes I know she says but you know him, have a little faith..ASK him she says he will answer you truthfully. So I hung up and saw he had replied No to the are you going every weekend. Feeling a little bold I texted back: Maybe if you want to take me with you sometimes I can cook for you and give you a backrub when you come in from playing in the snow...I waited tentatively, also wondering why he was texting and not calling and was "she" there, my voice said he doesnt know you are home, thinks you could be out with friends.... His reply came back....that's perfect he texts, I am gonan do all I can to make this happen...
I felt a rush of joy come over me, he does see me in his future! wow wow this is great! Negative thoughts came in, yeah but he says two more years, and he says weekends only with you he's still gonna be with "her" all week. Shut up I said to my negative voices and I texted back Internet access and you that's all I need to be happy...... He didn't reply and I started to worry oh geezee what if he wants to go up to that place where we cant even get cell phone service? I shall leave that one to God I told the voice, maybe I need a really quiet place....I know I'd bike and hike more if I'd get off this silly thing, oh and read too....I do want to be a writer....go to sleep Cassie I told myself.........all is well all is well everyday in every way, you're getting better and better.....don't rush it!
What today can you repair in your life? What part of you needs some sandpaper and some fresh paint? Perhaps and old relationship needs a new glance at with a wiser eye and you can see something beautiful in there if you are just willing to do a little work for it....if we hang on to what's durable and put in effort and paitence we can end up with a beautiful thing....everything old CAN be new again if we try.........Oh but be sure and use the fine sandpaper, rub it with some oil to seep into the dry spots, be loving and kind don't use the electric sander and the coarse grade paper....you risk rubbing it too thin or leaving an irreparable gash......
With Love and in the Light, Cassie
Everything Old is New Again
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